Like Sand Through an Hourglass, So are the Days of Our Kids Live: Making the Few Moments We Have With Our Children More Memorable

I cleaned out my pantry the other night. This might be a globally unique event for single men out there, but I did it. I won’t give myself too high of marks though, as not only did I throw away many items that were purchased by my ex-wife who moved out more than a year ago, but I threw away many items we purchased while living in New Hampshire more than 2 ½ years ago.  I think some of the expiration dates I found were chiseled in Roman numerals, so overdue on that cleaning for sure. Amongst the many items that I found tucked in the dark recesses of this food storage closet were three large chunks of Ambrosia dipping chocolate – which I'm sure is expired too.  I had purchased these last holiday season so that I could make candies with my children (a long running tradition).  Yet, as the unused chocolate testifies, we did not get around to making the chocolates this year.  Yes, it was a small thing, but it got me thinking of how many small things do we let slip by each day of our and our children’s lives?

Man they grow up fast, don’t they?  It seems like only yesterday they were scribbling on the walls, trying to pet porcupines, and smearing poo all over grandma’s walls. While I’m glad some of these idiosyncrasies have ceased, I do miss each day.  My guess is that I’m not alone in this sentiment that time is flying by too fast.  Now I am sure that a few of you want to get your kids out of the house as soon as possible. I get it. I’ve seen some of your kids. But as for me and many others, I’ve got some pretty awesome kids.  So I thought I put down a few of my thoughts to makes sure your days with your kids don’t slip away like sands in hour glass and instead become years of fond family memories:

1. Get Off Your Own Butt:

This is my first and most fundamental secret.  It really isn’t that hard to make a day meaningful, it can, however, be hard to get off your butt. So drop the remote, walk away from your after-hours work, put down your bloody the iPhone, and just do something with you kids.  If a child walks in and says "Mom/dad can you do ___________ with me?"  Get up from the couch or drop what you are doing and go spend that time.  I promise that you will not regret skipping that rerun of Law and Order.   

2. Look-up What is Going On:

Most every town, even the most Podunk town (and I know as I choose to live in such towns), has a list of events going on. Might be a Highlands Festival, might be a free concert in the park, might be a neighborhood outdoor movie, might be your local turnip festival; who cares.  There are usually tons of things going on and lots of them are free. So just Google "[Insert your town or country name] Calendar of Events," then go do something. Not too hard. (No really do it.  Do it now, just so you have not excused later).

Get a Trip-Treat:

When I was a kid, whenever I went with my father somewhere, I got an “trip-treat.”  This usually involved a stop at 7-Eleven for a Slurpee or a shake at Big Bees.  It was just something fun I got to share with my dad. So if dad was running to the hardware store, a kid or two always wanted to come along.  It made errands something more than parent being away form the family.  For my vegan readers, tofu-on-a-stick does not count as a trip-treat.  Just in case you were confused.

Add Some Tunes:

Every Saturday morning when I wake my kids up for chores, I crank Scandinavian techno (Avicii Pandora channel).  For some reason it feels more like a dance party than work that way. It doesn’t stop the grumbling, but nothing will.  Still music just makes things more fun.  I was raised working tin the yard to Billy Joel, Weird Al, and Andrew Lloyd Weber (this may explain a lot).  You may also want to add Christmas carols, patriotic music, Halloween music (are there any turkey carols?), Religious music, or even Irish drinking songs to any holiday or just a day to make a more festive. Have a kid make a playlist for your road trip, unless it’s your kid who is the Justin Bieber fan, then YOU make the playlist and teacher kid what is right and what is wrong.

Get Them Out of the House:

Fun does not have to be hard, but usually it just has to be something different than you normally do. Getting yourself out of the house is the first and most basic step, and it’s really not that hard. It’s like walking out the door. In fact it IS walking out the door.  So grab a couple of Little Sleazers pizza, find a blanket and Frisbee, then head to your neighborhood park. Or buy your necessary s’mores components (I also recommend a pack of baby wipes) a couple of roasting sticks, a stack of firewood and head up the canyon for a couple hours in the evening. I strongly recommend music too (see above).  Just and hour by the fire make many a memory.

Create a Summer Bucket List:

Before the beginning of every summer, my kids and I (and even the ex) sit down and make a summer bucket list for the kids. We actually don’t intend to do everything on the list, but it gives us a large selection of things to choose from. Each week we try to sneak in at least an activity or two. For the larger more ambitious activities, we stick those bad boys on the calendar or they don't get done. Keep your list and strike off the things you’ve already completed.  A pile of memories to be made there.

Do It Earlier, Rather Than Later: 

One trick I learned for myself years ago (which goes along with the bucket list) is to do whatever you plan to do as soon as you can. If you want to take your kids on that road trip, do it as soon as possible. If you put these things off until “the end of the summer” you will have a pile of things you didn’t do glaring back at you that first day back at school.

Give It a Name: 

Another little trick I do is to just give something a name that makes it sound like it’s more fun  than it really is (governments have been doing this for years).  So for example, sometimes I will cook an “FBF,” which is an acronym for a "fried-bucket-of-fun." This is where dad finds anything he can fry, puts it in a deep fat fryer, and service a mass bucket full of various fried objects (yes, I now add vegetable sides too in order to prevent the early onset of type II diabetes).  We might also have Fathers Friday of Fun where I grill something, let the kids invite a friend or two over, and chuck in a movie on the TV while we are cooking at eating. You might also coin Pizza-in-the-Park.  Try a game-night-grudge-match (this usually involves Monopoly).  Be sure to have some popcorn on hand.

Get ‘Em Working:

This may seem like the opposite, but it’s true.  First, it takes a lot of time and effort to get out and play and there is stuff that needs to get done. So put those kids to work and make them earn the play time. They can help with the laundry and the dishes and whatever else needs to get done.  Work also makes you appreciate your free time more.  Work is also a great time to bond with your kids and you siblings.  I have fond memories of my brothers (unintentional?) shooting nails from the nail gun past my head as we worked together. 


So there are my tips, take them or leave them.  It's free; it's a blog.  But I just read that the Ambrosia dipping chocolate does not expire for another month.  So we have some summer candy to make!